December 02, 2010
Putting the Damage On
Woke up just after 2:00 due to Em puking, possibly from some old cheese I warned her about. Now can't get back to sleep.Been wanting to do a brain dump for a long while, but never get to it - probably need actual paper and pen, but I'm trying this (again - a couple weeks ago, I started and stalled and Evernote lost even the attempt).
Listening to Beethoven's Piano Sonata in C Minor (Pathetique). Fell asleep listening to Bjork - mostly Homogenic, but started off with "Hyperballad" and "Violently Happy." Meditation music. Music I wish I could create.
Been in my head a lot lately. Between running, which I haven't done in forever now, and hunting, which I just did a bunch of last week, and I guess the several trips up north the last several weeks, I've had a lot of time to think.
Mostly, I think about sex. Yeah, at 36. I swear, I think about it more now than I did at 18, but maybe I'm remembering wrong.
Not related (or is it?), I've been feeling creatively void lately. And holy crap, my knuckle hairs at like 2" long. Wow.
Already on the 3rd movement of Pathetique - this is going by too quickly. I miss classical, I need to listen to more (at the risk of sounding like a pretentious douche). I think Tchaikovsky is next. Not as in "the next big thing." I mean next on my playlist. ;)
Before Beethoven, I gave old Tori a spin - "Putting the Damage On." I love that song for one fragment of a line, "... My best impression of my best Angie Dickenson." I don't know why, but I love that thought. Listening to Tori always ALWAYS makes me wistful for 'the old days.' Namely, being home from college, laying on my bed in my 'old' room at my parents' house in Streamwood, listening and identifying in some way with Greggy, The Dream King, and whoever was down past the mission (Oh, The Mission, what a great soundtrack that is.). I used to LOVE Tori Amos. But things got a little shaky at Boys for Pele, we rekindled with Choirgirl, but just went downhill from there (the exception being Strange Little Girl which has some pretty interesting covers). The funny thing is that I think Amy prefers the stuff I don't. I don't know if it's post-breakup with Eric (I think?) bitterness or what, but it seems to pit 'boy' against 'girl.' Or is that 'grrl?'
But enough about that.
I recently migrated my work desktop from crap-ass Windows Vista to Debian linux and in so doing, configured Pidgin, a multi-protocol IM chat client. Since then, I've been chatting/reconnecting with old online (and IRL) buds more. I don't think people do that enough. I'm sometimes a little self-conscious about it. Since I always seem to be the one who reaches out of the ether, it makes me wonder if those people really care to hear from me (or they'd contact me). But I figure maybe they're thinking the same thing, so I make the first move. As I get older, it gets easier to make the first move. Life's too short, if I knew then what I know now, etc. One one hand, it's selfless - I want the people I care about to know I care about them - though if you haven't heard from me, it doesn't necessarily mean I don't care about you, it just means you're not on one of my many IM buddy lists showing as 'available' when I'm reaching out. On the other hand, this need for contact may stem from the fact that I work in an office, by myself, secluded from others working for an already small (and getting smaller) company. As much of an 'alone' guy as I've always been, there are times when a little human contact is nice - aside from the jibber jabber at lunch with my few office mates.
It's funny, perhaps because of that seclusion, or maybe just because of my personality, I find myself engaging the people I do run into in life more. I find myself making the same small-talk chitter-chatter my dad would always make (and I assume still does) with store clerks, folks in line at the DMV, etc. I think it drives my wife nuts (as it used to drive me nuts).
Coincidentally, Tchaikovsky's Symphony Pathetique is now on. I think I'm going to take this as a cue to try sleep again. I didn't get to as much as I wanted to on this brain dump, and spent way more time on Tori than I expected, but oh well. Shockingly, I think I'm actually going to post this to my neglected blog. As is. No delay.
G'night.
July 30, 2009
Boo!
Yet again, it's been far too long since I've posted here. Oh well. Blame Twitter and/or Facebook if you must. Quick hit-and-run run-down:
A) Em's great. I love that little girl. Words and photos fall miles short of describing her awesomeness.
B) I ran a marathon in April and I'm supposedly training for the Chicago Marathon in October, but I haven't run in almost 2 full weeks due to a creeping illness which has taken away all of my energy. Need to shake it off soon.
C) I never wrote a proper Illinois Marathon wrap-up. I thought I had one well underway, but all I can find now is my 'notes' file. Here it is:
<Quote>
What went wrong:
Inconsistency in first 10 (and throughout). a) Should have had 1-mile paces. b) park route was slow and passing was impossible c) 2nd half was hillier than expected.
Calf cramp - pre-race stretching? Water/nutrition?
Hip fatigue - stride?
Wind/uphills = mental. 9MPH headwinds on the uphill stretch around Mile 18-19.
Tingling in last 2-3 miles.
What went right:
Tim, Chris, Dennis.
Had gas left to sprint the end.
Weather (other than wind).
CROWD/VOLUNTEER SUPPORT!!!
Other points:
The Champaign Country Club mile SUCKED! My slowest mile.
Garmin was good, but it disagrees with reality. It gave me about 0.01 mile extra per course mile. At the end of the race, that added up to over a quarter mile of difference. It's minor, but noteworthy. Also, for whatever reason, my watch time differs from the official chip time but nearly a minute. I'm not sure how to resolve that.
<EndQuote>
My photos from the event.
Tim Borbely's photos from the event.
Oh and here, listen to this PODCAST about the Illinois Marathon: 061_2009IllinoisMarathonPodcast.mp3
D) Motorcycling:
i) Not ONLY motorcycling related, but everyone who drives should visit The Black Nail Brigade web site and in particular, read The Black Nail Brigade Manifesto. This is no joke. This is not a fashion statement. This is about life and death and the preservation and prevention thereof. Go. Read. Now. I'll wait for you.
ii) Been doing a bit of riding. Not much on the dual sport, but some here and there.
iii) Got waylaid by a minor accident in May when an ignorant woman pulled in front of me. You can search out details in my Flickr photo stream. I am well or at least really close to it, the bike is well, damage insurance has been settled, injusry insurance is still outstanding.
iv) Just bought tickets to the Moto GP races in Indianapolis at the end of August. This will be my first race experience ever, believe it or not - car, motorcycle, whatever. Should be a blast.
E) Computers - I've been burned out on technology lately in part because a seriese of hardware failures have just beaten the crap out of me both at home and at work. But I've lately heard about some interesting projects which have rekindled a bit of a spark. I no particular order of usefulness to my life, examples are: Xen, eyeOS, Evernote (used it before, using it more now), a cheap analog to digital video capture device from Woot!, some stuff with MythTV, and a few other things I've forgotten already. OLPC or something like it for Emily? Anyway, yeah, tech = cool.
F) Pets: Harrison died back in November. Not sure if I ever posted that. Also, a few months back we got fish. Now we have a TON of them. And a snail. I love watching them.
G) Flying. Have done NONE in a long, LONG time. Doesn't even look like I'll make it to Oshkosh this year. A bummer, but oh well. *sigh*
Ok, I'm running out of steam on this latest hit-and-run. As I always say, I'll try not to be such a stranger. Yeah, right.
Later.
September 27, 2007
Brain dump.
I'm in a mood. Borderline bad mood. Sad mood? Moody mood? Fall mood? Weather's right for it, that's for sure.
Mom and Dad had to put their lab Kiddie to sleep this morning. She was the second-oldest and I think represents the first out-of-order death of one of their labs. I'm not sure what the final diagnosis was, but I know she had a LOT of fluid in her abdomen and when they went in expecting to find a perforated bowel, instead they found a diseased-looking liver (though her liver enzymes had come back nominal). She went downhill fast, so the decision was made. The message from my mom is the epitome of the sound of a breaking heart.
What else? Stuff. I don't very often let on about any problems between me and My Darling Rose, and usually that works out OK for me, but I guess in some cases you've just got to blow off some steam. I'm not getting into details, but suffice to say that even though we've talked things to death, and I keep trying to move past real and imagined infractions, I'm left feeling sad, disrespected, and otherwise kicked in the shorts. I'm generally really good at "forgive and forget," but I'm just having a hard time this time. I think the forgiving is covered. The forgetting needs more time to bake, I guess. What she did wasn't the end of the world and in a twisted, poorly-reasoned way was done to 'protect' me, so I don't begrudge her that - it's the aftermath and cleanup that's left a sour taste in my mouth. I just need time.
She thinks I'm odd in that I don't regularly bitch about her to friends - I'm not even certain that she believes that I don't - but ask any of my friends - IRL or online - and I really don't think I complain about my wife often. I don't mind if she kvetches to her friends about stupid little things I do - I guess that's normal and a good way to avoid letting the little things build up and annoy you. I would just hope if there's something that really bothers her about me, she'd tell me. As I do. In the discussion, I pointed out that she's my best friend, and thus the one I complain to about my wife. I'm not sure if she was amused by that as I was.
But anyway, things and stuff, things and stuff. I did a podcast talking about this stuff and then decided the wind was too annoying and it was likely boring as hell. So no podcast for you.
I continue to be incredibly far behind on projects - work, home, personal, etc. I have recordings and photos I haven't posted from well over a year ago. What is wrong with me?
This weekend, Saturday the 29th, is our 6th anniversary. I did my shopping yesterday and tried my best to stick with the Candy/Iron traditional gift theme. Some of the gifts work quite well/literally, one takes an amusing stretch to make fit, and yet others are in no way "Candy" or "Iron," but I still think she'll like them. I had a hard time coming up with dinner plans since the place I was counting on apparently no longer exists. I also didn't know what else to do after dinner. I wanted to take her to a play downtown, but couldn't pick anything out, and things that looked good were sold out (I waited until last-minute as usual). I finally hit upon an idea that I think she will either love or think is pretty stupid. Wish me luck. 6 years. Crazy.
I recently acquired my first Elliott Smith CD, From a Basement on a Hill, I think is the title. I liked one of his "Waltz No. xx" songs which got radio play a few years ago. I think it was from the XO album. I always have meant to pick up some of his stuff, especially after he killed himself, but jsut never have. This weekend we were in a used CD shoppe and I thought to look for something of his (a few weeks ago when we were in Madison, I nearly bought a set of his, so it was on my mind). I didn't find any in the racks, but thought to ask the girl working there and she said, yes, actually, she had just been listening to it earlier, so it was behind the counter. It worked out well because this album has "Memory Lane" on it, which is a cute upbeat-sounding tune I like which I picked up from the Podsafe Music Network and even played on my show over a year ago, I think. Anyway, I haven't been able to give it a full listen, but what I have heard, I like. It seems there are some throwaway tracks on it, as is expected, but other songs just grab and hold. I was listening to it (on a Discman no less) the other night while I walked Martini. The moon was nearly full, lightly shrouded in thin clouds, and while it was warm, there was a slight breeze and mist hanging in the air reminding me that Autumn has indeed arrived. The music, the atmosphere, my headspace was all perfect. Just a boy, his music, and his dog. You've got to enjoy the simple things.
By the way, while at the CD shop, we also picked up Nirvana's In Utero which we didn't have on CD, Blue Man Group's The Complex, MDR grabbed Happy Days by Catherine Wheel, and I found Shakira's Oral Fixation Vol. 2 for her. She's been on a Shakira kick lately, and I have to admit that "Don't Bother" track easily gets caught in my head. It reminds me of Cher's "Believe" in that "I swear to god, I'm not a homosexual" kind of way. I'll be sad if physically stored music ever goes away entirely. CDs are a poor substitute for pawing through 12" vinyl records, but they're certainly better than scrolling through a web site. Sigh.
Well, I thing that's enough babble for now. I'm not finished, but I'm done. Know what I mean? I'd really like to be able to sit down in front of my keyboards, mixer, guitars, mics and computer/recorder with these thoughts and this mood. I keep telling myself, "Maybe tonight."
Maybe tonight.
February 27, 2007
Too Much Input, Not Enough Output
Between message boards, IMs live streams, occasionally SecondLife, podcasts, Twitter, television, etc., etc., my brain is way too much in IN mode to get into OUT mode. I'm overloaded. I need to jsut dump some of this out to my nearly defunct 'blog.' And yet, there's little time for much more than this little whiny blurb.
Mental constipation, that's what it is.
Twitter helps, because I can babble easily and somewhat reliably from my Blackberry, but it lack permanence and it's not really where I want my 'stuff' collected. I need to be able to easily post to Eblo from the Blackberry. I'll figure it out.
My Darling Rose's screensaver scrolls something to the effect of, "Stop waiting, start writing." Word ALL the way up.
On the technical side, I'm likely going to be moving the server for EblotW/Ratula.net, so if things break and anyone happens to notice, that's likely why. Hopefully I'll have comments back after that (they're still shut off now). That makes me think, "If a podcast fades on the interweb and no one would have downloaded it anyway, does it still not NOT make a sound?
Ok, back to work.
P.S. I'm loving this built-in spell-checking in Firefox 2.x. Awesome! (take a drink!)
September 18, 2006
A Podcast Star is Born
040_a_podcast_star_is_born.mp3 - 38.6MB - 54:54
Yes, this is a long episode, but hopefully its worth it. And hey, it's under an hour - that's kind of short for me.
Click the photo for the full set.
EMILY WAS BORN!!!!! August 22, 7.5#, 19.75" long. Mother and child are doing great and you can hear all about it.
Ths show runs the gamut from us thinking she was on her way, to her birth, my musings, her first bath, and even a walk through a forest preserve.
There are TONS of pictures of her life so far. If you want to follow along with the birthing and bathing pictures, click the image above. If you want to follow along with the sound seeing through the forest preserve including our run-in with geocachers and C-130s, click on the image below. The geocache in question was GCW593 - The Des Plaines River Trail, which the GameDorks did apparently find.
Click the photo for the full set.
Please feel free to comment on the Flickr photos or use and of the contact information below. Thanks. It's good to be back to podcasting. And it's GREAT to be a father!
Contact info:
- email: eblo at ratula dot net
- call: 206-FEW-EBLO (206-339-3256)
- skype: oblivion9999 - now with voicemail!
- Subscribe to my podcasts via RSS: 
- Add yourself to my Frappr Map.
- Friend me on MySpace.
- My banners and promos
